


youth

by xlightless



Category: B.A.P
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Breaking and Entering, M/M, Partying, Underage Drinking, petty revenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-28 03:51:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8430730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xlightless/pseuds/xlightless
Summary: Youngjae finishes high school tomorrow, and he thinks his last night of freedom and reckless youth deserves to end with a bang.





	

Youngjae is the class president. He is a perfect student with perfect attendance. He is a quiet student who will not speak out of line. He is well-respected among his peers and the staff. He is going to attend a university with prestige and graduate in four years with a major in neuroscience because that is what his parents want him to do.

Youngjae is not a person.

Youngjae is an ID number in a list on a piece of paper. He is a face to a name among hundreds. He is a string of six letter grades. He is a list of qualifications. He is a college application.

Youngjae is a conduit for his parents to live their failed dreams through.

But tonight, Youngjae is just a teenager.

The day before his last final, Youngjae tells his parents he’s staying at Daehyun’s house for an all-night study session, and they believe him because they don’t think he’ll be doing much else. What else does he have time for in his life? He’s too busy focusing on getting into college. His parents have no idea what he’s about to do tonight.

That’s why Youngjae buzzes with excitement when he slips out of his uniform and shimmies into black skinny jeans and a low v-neck. He may have peeked inside his older brother’s closet for the clothes, but he doesn’t have anything else besides button-ups and several sets of uniforms. His brother won’t find out––probably. 

Youngjae steps out of the bathroom and brushes the invisible dust from the shirt. He looks up and finds Daehyun staring at him. “What?”

Daehyun laughs. “I didn’t think you had other clothes besides your uniform.”

Youngjae rolls his eyes as Daehyun snickers. “Alright, smart ass, let’s go have the night of our lives.”

//

The first item on their list is to right the worst wrong done unto Jung Daehyun.

That means heading into the supermarket and buying a fuckton of canned sardines to dump into Kim Yukwon’s locker at school.

Kim Yukwon has been Daehyun’s long-time boyfriend since sophomore year––“Which, let’s be real here, is a pretty long ass time to be dating someone in high school,” Daehyun admits in the passenger seat of Youngjae’s car––but Daehyun caught Yukwon making out with a student in one of the private music rooms. Daehyun was pretty torn up about it for the following days.

A couple weeks before finals, Daehyun called Youngjae after his tutoring session, spluttering and crying into the receiver. Youngjae had to hastily come up with an excuse to drive to Daehyun’s house because he knew Daehyun wouldn’t be able to handle this on his own.

Daehyun isn’t the type of person to be able to shoulder his problems alone like Youngjae can. He was able to get over it, but he admitted that the relationship was over before they even started their senior year. 

“I’m just saying we should do something that will completely humiliate him, you know?” Youngjae dumps several sardine cans into their shopping cart. Daehyun may be over it, but Youngjae will never let go of the fact that Kim fucking Yukwon broke his best friend’s heart. “Like… _Lex talionis_ from the Code of Hammurabi. An eye for an eye!”

“Are you _seriously_ reviewing right now?” Daehyun asks, his eyes wide in disbelief. 

“Sorry! I have my history final tomorrow, so… You know,” Youngjae says with a shrug. “Anyway, what I’m getting at is we should do something else besides dumping a few cans of sardines into his locker. Sure, he’s going to be annoyed as he cleans it out, but _what else_ is he going to feel?”

Daehyun looks down into the cart. He whispers, “Nothing.”

“Exactly! We have to come up with something that will make him feel like utter _shit_.” Youngjae rushes down the aisle with Daehyun close behind him.

“And how are we going to do that?” Daehyun asks.

Youngjae heads for the pharmacy section. He looks at Daehyun with a wide grin. “With gentian violet.”

Daehyun follows Youngjae into an aisle full of medicine and antiseptics. “What the hell is that?” 

“My mom’s friend used it as an anti-fungal treatment a couple months ago and it stained everything fucking _purple_ ,” Youngjae replies. He begins scanning the shelves, looking for the name, and spots a row of tiny bottles near the top shelf labelled _Gentian Violet Topical Solution_. He plucks it off the shelf and holds it up for Daehyun to see. “Here it is.”

“Okay, so… I’m assuming we’re not staining the sardines?”

Youngjae’s grin widens. “No, we’re not. Come on, we don’t have all night.”

Twenty minutes later, Youngjae parks across the street from Kim Yukwon’s house, a simple one-story with a simpler yard. It’s late and all the lights are off. Daehyun squirms in the passenger seat. Youngjae buzzes with excitement.

“What if we get caught?” Daehyun asks. He looks between the plastic bag in his lap and Yukwon’s house.

“We’ll be quick. Get in, get out. No one will even know we were there.” Youngjae digs into the plastic bag and takes the gentian violet. “Squeeze a couple drops of this into his facial cleanser and we’re all set. Just don’t get any of it on yourself.”

“I _know_ that,” Daehyun replies. 

Youngjae pauses for a moment. He can feel Daehyun’s nervousness beside him like a separate entity entirely. He looks over at Daehyun. “Are you ready?”

Daehyun licks his lips. He takes a deep breath. “Not really.”

Youngjae nods and opens his door. “Alright, let’s go.”

They dart around the house to the back and climb the fence. Daehyun’s been to Yukwon’s house plenty of times before, so Youngjae looks to him when they land on the soft grass in the backyard. He points to a window on the far right of the house. They slide the window open and find Yukwon’s bedroom empty.

“He must have snuck out to Junhong’s party,” Daehyun says as he steps off the desk and onto the floor. 

Youngjae lets out a small laugh as he heads to the door. “Even better. Where’s his bathroom?”

“Down the hall.”

Youngjae presses his ear to the door. Not a sound. He turns the knob and pulls the door open. He cringes as it creaks. There isn’t any light except for a small one plugged into an outlet on the wall. A strip of light spills from underneath a door down the hall. Youngjae slips out with Daehyun beside him.

Daehyun takes Youngjae’s hand and leads him down the dim hall. They duck into the bathroom as a door opens. 

“Shit, shit, shit, close the door,” Youngjae hisses as he flips on the light.

Daehyun pushes the door closed with a quiet _click_ and turns the lock.

Footsteps pad on the floor, light and nearly soundless, getting closer with each passing second. Youngjae stares at the door, motionless. He hears his blood rushing in his ears. His heart races. Adrenaline spikes through every vein of his body.

Daehyun squeezes his hand around Youngjae’s.

Youngjae glances down at their hands, fighting whatever thoughts that threaten to flood his mind right now. He tries to even out his breathing.

The footsteps pass and fade, and Youngjae feels his entire body relax. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out the gentian violet.

“Will you do the honors?” Youngjae whispers, unable to keep the grin off his face.

Daehyun takes the bottle into his hands. Youngjae sees they’re trembling. Daehyun unscrews the cap, careful not to get any of the solution on his fingertips, and nods to the facial cleansing bottle on the sink. Youngjae can barely hold back a giggle as he opens the bottle. He watches Daehyun tip the gentian violet into the bottle and the couple drops that bleed into the soap. He closes the bottle again and shakes it.

  
_Let’s go_ , Daehyun mouths after he caps the gentian violet.

They make it back into Yukwon’s room without being caught. Daehyun’s already halfway out the window when Youngjae gets another idea. He takes a sticky note from Yukwon’s desk and a pen from a bundle in a mug.

“What are you doing?” Daehyun asks, his voice urgent.

“Shh, I’ll be quick,” Youngjae replies as he writes down a quick _You made the wrong sucker a cuckold_.

Daehyun squints into the darkness and scoffs. “Will you _stop_ with the literary references?”

Youngjae puts the sticky note on Yukwon’s laptop screen and follows Daehyun out the window. “Um, no.”

//

Their second destination is Junhong’s end-of-the-year party. Junhong is Daehyun’s friend, which––by association––makes him Youngjae’s friend, too. He’s just as friendly as Daehyun, though not as talkative, but he’s charming enough to have the entire graduating class come to a house party when his parents are on a business trip across the world.

When Daehyun and Youngjae walk through the door, briefly dazzled by the flashing disco lights and alcohol and screaming teenagers, they think it looks more like a party for the end of the world. They walk down the crowded hall, trying not to lose each other.

“It’s the class president and his right hand man!” someone exclaims, grabbing onto Youngjae’s shoulder.

And suddenly, Youngjae and Daehyun are swarmed. So many people are talking and offering them drinks, but they keep their distance like they’re afraid to touch either of them.

“Is that really them?” Youngjae hears someone ask. “Wouldn’t they be better off studying?”

Youngjae searches for the source of the voice, but there are so many people around him. He feels irritation bubble up inside of him. What do _they_ know about him? Not even _he_ knows shit about himself. What a load of _bullshit._ He’s going to show them he isn’t the perfect student they all think he is.

“Youngjae…,” Daehyun whispers into Youngjae’s ear. He takes Youngjae by the elbow, but he stands his ground. He finally realizes that he stopped in the middle of the hall.

“Someone get me a beer!” Youngjae shouts above the chaos.

The mass hands him cans of beer, both opened and unopened. Youngjae grabs one. It’s cold in his fingertips. It sobers him more than anything else could have. What the _hell_ is he doing? He glances at Daehyun, who’s giving him a similar look of horror.

But Youngjae finds it in himself to pop open the can and brings it to his mouth. He takes a deep breath and tilts his head back.

There are two things Youngjae discovers in that moment: beer tastes absolutely fucking disgusting and he loves it when people cheer for him (when it isn’t for an academic award).

“The class president is chugging a fucking beer!” someone shouts. 

The crowd begins chanting “Chug, chug, chug!” over and over until Youngjae can’t do it anymore. His throat burns a little. He splutters, some of the beer spilling over his mouth. He leans forward, letting it drip off his face before he wipes his lips with the back of his hand. He feels a hand on the small of his back, and he straightens.

Youngjae looks into Daehyun’s eyes, not exactly concerned but hidden behind something Youngjae doesn’t really recognize. 

“Dude,” Daehyun whispers. He takes the can out of Youngjae’s hand and takes a quick sip. He pushes through the crowd, taking Youngjae by the elbow. When he glances back at Youngjae, that unfamiliar look is replaced with an amused grin. “That’s probably the ballsiest thing I’ve ever seen you do.”

Youngjae groans. “I’m never doing it again. That was so gross.”

“Daehyun?!” Yukwon shouts, jumping every couple seconds to see them.

Youngjae sees how Daehyun tenses. Yukwon makes his way through the crowd and slings an arm around Daehyun’s shoulders. Youngjae fights the urge to scowl.

“I didn’t know you’d be here!” Yukwon says. He presses a kiss against Daehyun’s temple. “Let’s get you a drink!”

Daehyun shoots Youngjae a desperate look.

“Actually,” Youngjae says. He grabs onto Yukwon’s arm and pulls it off Daehyun’s shoulders. He’s pretty sure the alcohol is making him more reckless, and he’s never felt more confident in his life. “He isn’t going anywhere with you tonight.”

Yukwon looks over at Youngjae with a frown. Youngjae knew Yukwon hated him even before dating Daehyun. Miraculously, Daehyun seemed oblivious about it until he found Yukwon with another guy.

“You don’t own him,” Yukwon spits, tugging his arm out of Youngjae’s grip.

Youngjae’s blood begins to boil. “No, I don’t, but neither do you.”

Yukwon takes a step toward Youngjae. He growls, “What the fuck did you say?”

“You fucking heard me,” Youngjae replies. He stands his ground, looking right into Yukwon’s eyes. He can feel the stares from the people surrounding them, including Daehyun’s, but he can’t bring himself to care.

Daehyun places a hand on Youngjae’s elbow. “Youngjae, it’s okay…”

“It’s _not_ ,” Youngjae says under his breath. “Do you know how much Daehyun sacrificed for you?”

Yukwon raises an eyebrow, but he doesn’t say anything.

“He did _so_ much for you, and how do you repay him? You go off and cheat on him like a dirty fucking whore!” Youngjae shouts. The hands curled into fists at his sides are the only thing holding him back from landing a punch into Yukwon’s nose.

Yukwon’s eyes widen as panic colors his face red. He stays quiet.

Youngjae takes a deep breath. “You have a lot of nerve thinking you can just come back to him after you were making out with someone else in the music room!”

Yukwon’s anger flares behind his eyes again, reigniting with a new passion.

Youngjae almost fears for his life in that moment.

“Stop making up lies. You’re just jealous because the _one_ person you clung onto throughout _all_ of high school couldn’t put up with your bullshit anymore!”

Yukwon’s words slice through Youngjae like a knife. He hates to be alone, and––coincidentally––so did Daehyun. He’s the one who always stuck by Youngjae. Even after Youngjae became the class president, even when he was surrounded by people at school, he still couldn’t shake that feeling of impenetrable loneliness.

So, when Yukwon spits those words at Youngjae’s face, his chest constricts a little.

“That’s not…” Youngjae can’t finish. His throat closes up.

“He’s not lying,” Daehyun says. His hand comes up to Youngjae’s shoulder and squeezes. “I saw you.”

Yukwon’s gaze flickers between Daehyun then Youngjae. “Wha––“

“I kept quiet because I thought you’d stop, but you didn’t,” Daehyun continues. He steps in between Youngjae and Yukwon. “I should have said this earlier, but fuck you, asshole. We’re done.”

Yukwon opens his mouth to say something, then closes it. He scoffs, then turns around and pushes through the circle of on-lookers.

When the crowd disperses to other parts of the house, muttering in disappointment that the argument didn’t end in a fist fight, Youngjae feels himself relax. Daehyun turns around to face Youngjae. He looks into Daehyun’s eyes, suddenly sober and unsure.

“Thanks,” Daehyun says, leaning close to Youngjae. He places his hand on the small of Youngjae’s back. “Let’s go find Junhong.”

Youngjae can feel his skin ignite where Daehyun touches him.

They walk through the house, trying to avoid bumping into too many people. The closer they get to the living room, the louder the music gets. Each beat vibrates in the core of Youngjae’s body. He feels himself getting lost in the ocean of chaos and bodies, but Daehyun keeps him anchored.

They find Junhong in the kitchen trying to keep the meager snack table from getting any more sparse. He looks up from opening a box of crackers as Youngjae and Daehyun walk through the door.

“Hey! Did you guys just get here?” Junhong asks with a wide smile. He dumps the crackers into a bowl and spins around to open the fridge. “Let me get you a drink. Beer? Soda?”

Daehyun slings an arm around Junhong’s shoulders. “You didn’t hear the shit going on, like, five minutes ago? Youngjae chugged half a beer and everybody went batshit.”

Junhong’s eyebrows raise as he turns to look at Youngjae. “You _what_?!”

“Chugged half a beer,” Youngjae replies with a laugh.

Junhong straightens up, letting Daehyun’s arms fall off his shoulders, and tosses a water bottle to Youngjae. “Drink this before you have any more.” He turns to Daehyun. “You want anything?”

Daehyun plucks a soda from the fridge.

Youngjae opens the bottle and takes a quick sip. He listens Daehyun and Junhong talk, feeling out of place all of a sudden. Yukwon’s words echo in his head, taunting him. 

Then, Daehyun glances at him and laughs.

“I see you eyeing your beer,” Daehyun says, holding the can up. 

Youngjae trades with Daehyun and downs the rest of his beer because, really, if he thinks about it, sobering up is the last thing he wants to do right now. 

“So, what brings the president and his right hand to my party?” Junhong asks.

Youngjae tosses the can into the trash. He clears his throat of the burn from the alcohol. “We’re looking for the night of our lives.”

Junhong hums. “Define _‘night of our lives_ ’ because, you know, that’s a _completely_ subjective concept, and what I define as the ‘night of _my_ life’ could be, like, _for example_ , getting head from star soccer player Moon Jongup––“

Daehyun makes a gagging noise and places his hand on Junhong’s mouth. “I’m gonna have to stop you right there.”

Junhong swats the hand away. “ _Anyway_ , the night of your lives is going to be fucking _wild_ , just trust me, alright?”

“I’m pretty sure I don’t want Jongup sucking me off,” Youngjae says.

Junhong snorts. “In my entire high school career, I’ve found that an overwhelming amount of people––both guys _and_ girls––want to either suck Jongup off or have him suck them off. He’s a fucking _god_.”

“Thanks for the information,” Daehyun says. “Let me make a graph representing the correlation between how horny he makes you and how––“

“This is why we need to get you a drink!” Junhong interrupts. He takes the soda from Daehyun’s hand and replaces it with a beer. “You’re supposed to leave the homework at _home_ , you know.”

Daehyun doesn’t say anything, but he scoffs. 

Youngjae laughs, just glad that _for once_ he’s out surrounded by _people_ and not _books_. 

//

The night, as Junhong predicted, gets fucking wild. 

Youngjae finds something cathartic in throwing himself in a dense crowd of people and just _letting go_. He lets the music take over his body. He turns off his mind, every nagging thought, and everything concerning his future. 

Tonight, Youngjae is just a teenager, letting this moment stretch out into infinity.

Daehyun dances beside Youngjae, a wide grin on his face. He takes Youngjae’s hand and pulls him closer. The room is hot and Youngjae feels a bead of sweat roll down his temple. He wonders if he’ll spontaneously combust if he gets any closer to Daehyun.

“Cops!” someone shouts over the music.

And the moment is done. Teenagers scramble around. Heated limbs fly in every direction. The music abruptly cuts out. Youngjae nearly loses Daehyun.

“Follow me!” Daehyun grabs Youngjae’s wrist and pulls him to the backyard. The crowd pushes against them.

Youngjae elbows anybody who gets in his way. “Daehyun! Ugh! Why––”

He trips on a bottle of beer. He bumps into Daehyun’s back, his nose hitting Daehyun’s shoulder blade. 

Youngjae’s heart pounds in his ears. Daehyun keeps pulling him. They reach the back door and emerge out with a handful of others. The cool night air makes Youngjae shiver. Goosebumps prickle his skin.

“Come on, we gotta get outta here,” Daehyun says. His head whips around, looking for an escape.

“Stop! It’s the police!” a deep voice bellows. The back door slams open.

Youngjae pulls Daehyun to the side of the house as the officer begins wrangling up the teenagers like cattle. Youngjae leads Daehyun into the shadow of a shed. They stand face-to-face, their breath reeking of alcohol. If Youngjae really focuses, he can see the way Daehyun’s eyes glint under the dim streetlamp.

Youngjae forces his foggy mind to focus. “You think you can hop the fence?”

Daehyun seems to tear his gaze away from Youngjae. He looks to the fence. “I can _climb_ it, not _hop_ it.”

“Good enough,” Youngjae replies. He peeks his head around the side of the shed to see if the officer is still there. 

He’s too busy chasing around the other teenagers to notice Youngjae and Daehyun. Youngjae presses his back against the fence, holding his palms out on his knee as a step for Daehyun. 

“Hurry up before he sees,” Youngjae hisses.

Daehyun steps onto Youngjae’s hands and pulls himself above the fence. Youngjae watches as he stumbles onto the other side and listens as he falls with a grunt. 

“Come on!” Daehyun whispers on the other side. 

Youngjae finds a tool chest to step on and struggles to pull himself up. Skinny jeans don’t exactly give him the best range of movement.

“Hey!” the officer shouts. Footsteps begin to approach.

Youngjae glances behind himself. The officer is coming towards them.

“Oh _shit_.” Youngjae falls onto the other side in a patch of grass. He lets out a huff. 

The officer talks to another one on his radio. “There are more in the backyard next door!”

“Fuck you!” Daehyun shouts as he pulls Youngjae up. 

Running is all they can do right now. Youngjae’s heart pounds in his chest. He runs out the open gate and onto the open street. He runs even though red and blue lights flash behind him. He focuses on Daehyun’s hand holding his.

When they reach Youngjae’s car on the next block, they sit in silence for a moment, their breaths the only sound exchanged between them. And then Daehyun is laughing. Youngjae jumps. He stares at Daehyun in horror.

“What? Why are you laughing?” Youngjae asks.

Daehyun shakes his head, his shoulders still trembling even as he tries to stop laughing. “I don’t–– Man, I don’t _know_. We just ran from the fuckin’ _cops_!”

Youngjae thinks about it for a moment and figures that this whole thing _is_ a little ridiculous. He finds himself laughing with Daehyun because, even though he’s still scared _shitless_ and maybe he’s still a little tipsy, he still can’t believe they ran from the police.

“We should go.” Daehyun looks behind them.

And Youngjae realizes that he’s still a little more than tipsy. His hands grip the steering wheel. “We’re both drunk. We’re not going to be driving anywhere right now.”

Daehyun sighs, the breath smelling sharp and sour. It fills the inside of Youngjae’s car. He rolls down the window, breathing in the humid air.

Daehyun pulls his phone out of his pocket and scrolls through his contacts.

“What are you doing?” Youngjae asks.

Daehyun taps on a name. Youngjae can’t read the name clearly. “I know someone who can help us.”

//

“I cannot believe you two,” Yongguk says. 

Youngjae shrinks in the backseat of Yongguk’s car. He wrings his hands in his lap just to give himself something to do. His stomach twists itself into knots. When Daehyun said he’d be calling someone, Youngjae didn’t think he’d be calling his _step-brother_. Yongguk is a smart guy who seems like he has a moral compass that always points in the right direction every time. He even graduated at the top of his class in high school after his parents told him he wouldn’t be able to accomplish anything in a career making music––just to _spite_ them.

Yongguk is an impressive guy, and this is _not_ the kind of situation Youngjae wants Yongguk to see him in.

“You got _drunk_ at a party with people you barely know! If that isn’t irresponsible, I don’t know what is!” Yongguk exclaims. He huffs. Youngjae sees Yongguk’s knuckles turn white on the steering wheel.

This is _definitely_ not the situation Youngjae wanted Yongguk to see them in.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know who else to call, hyung,” Daehyun whispers in the front seat. Youngjae can hear the regret in Daehyun’s voice.

Yongguk sighs. “I know. If you were planning on drinking, you should have at least done it with people you could trust. What if something happened to you?”

“Sorry, hyung,” Daehyun whispers again.

“Stop saying sorry. Just stay at my apartment for tonight. I know our parents aren’t going to like seeing you two like this.” Yongguk glances back at Youngjae through the rearview mirror. “And Youngjae?”

Youngjae looks up. “Y-yes?” 

“We’ll pick up your car tomorrow morning.”

Youngjae can only nod.

When they reach Yongguk’s apartment, Youngjae and Daehyun tail behind Yongguk like lost children. They sit on the black leather couch as Yongguk heads into the kitchen.

“Are you hungry?” Yongguk asks.

Daehyun glances at Youngjae, who shrugs.

“Yeah,” Daehyun replies.

“Bbang? What’s going on?” 

Youngjae glances at the bedroom door as Himchan walks out. He’s Yongguk’s boyfriend. They met in college. Youngjae doesn’t know their whole story, but Daehyun told him something about how they got paired up for their senior project that involved the entire music department of their college. Himchan, as a performing arts major with an emphasis in piano, and Yongguk, as a songwriting and composition double major, started the project hating each other’s guts and _somehow_ ended up in a relationship by the time they graduated. 

“Daehyun and Youngjae are sleeping here for tonight,” Yongguk says. He comes into the living room holding two cups of water and places them on the coffee table in front of Daehyun and Youngjae. “Drink lots of water tonight. You’ll get a nasty hangover if you don’t.”

“Thank you,” Youngjae and Daehyun say as they reach out for the cups.

Himchan stares at them, his eyes still foggy with sleep, then follows Yongguk into the kitchen. Youngjae sips his water. He hears Himchan talking to Yongguk in a hushed whisper. He struggles to listen to them, but he feels Daehyun tap his shoulder. He turns to look.

“Move your legs,” Daehyun whispers, his eyes wide. He almost looks green.

Youngjae pulls his legs up to his chest as Daehyun stumbles off the couch to the bathroom. He slams the door behind him.

“What’s going on?” Yongguk looks around the corner at Youngjae.

The sound of Daehyun vomiting into the toilet is Yongguk’s only reply. He sighs, closing his eyes before disappearing back into the kitchen. 

Youngjae turns his cup in his hands, staring into the liquid. He has a final that’s twenty-five percent of his grade tomorrow and he can barely think straight. He’s beginning to regret this whole night. He should be sleeping, or at the very least, cramming last minute details into his head. He’s beginning to panic. His vision begins to darken at the edges. His head pounds.

“Take a breath.”

Youngjae blinks. He looks up to find Himchan looking down at him. He places a warm hand on Youngjae’s shoulder. That’s when Youngjae realizes he’s been shaking.

“Breathe,” Himchan says, calm but stern.

Youngjae lets out a breath, inhales a lungful, then exhales. He feels tears prick his eyes. He shouldn’t have done this. He should go home, but he can’t let his parents see him like this. They’ll kill him. He hates to be such a burden on Yongguk and Himchan, but where else is he supposed to go?

Himchan squeezes Youngjae’s shoulder, then sits down beside him. “There you go. The food will be ready soon.”

Youngjae sees Yongguk ease the bathroom door open before slipping inside. He can hear Yongguk’s deep voice talking to Daehyun. He places his cup on the coffee table and rests his head on his knees. 

“Oh my god, I–– I shouldn’t…have done…” Youngjae can’t even finish. He draws in a shaking breath. He doesn’t even realize he’s crying until he feels the tears soaking through his pants.

“It doesn’t change the fact that you still did it and that you’re here right now, drunk as fuck,” Himchan says, and that does _not_ help Youngjae’s breakdown, “but how is a single grade on a single test going to affect your future in the long run?”

“It’s twenty-five percent of my grade.”

“You seem like a smart kid. So you bomb it, what’s the worst that can happen?” Himchan asks.

Youngjae pauses to think for a moment. He looks at Himchan. “My grade drops to a B.”

“You’re still going to get into college.” Himchan scoffs. “This is a small moment in your life. Love it or hate it, you’re still going to have to go through it. Nobody is going to look at the grade you got on this specific test and determine the worth of your entire life on it. So, don’t act like it does.”

Youngjae doesn’t know what to say. It’s easier said than done, but Himchan has a point. This isn’t going to matter five, ten, twenty years down the road, so why is he acting like it will? He’s been so busy focusing on the minor details that he didn’t bother to look at how much farther he has to go.

For once, Youngjae thinks about what _he_ wants to do with his life.

“Thanks, hyung,” Youngjae whispers.

Himchan smiles. “No problem.”

//

Youngjae wakes up with a headache the next morning. Early morning light spills beneath the curtain of the balcony doors. He sits up. He sees Daehyun’s silhouette standing on the balcony. He stands up and walks to the balcony, sliding the door open quietly.

“Good morning,” Youngjae whispers. There’s something about early mornings that always make him too careful, like he’s afraid of breaking the tranquility.

Daehyun turns around with a smile. He holds a mug of hot coffee that he offers to Youngjae. “Hey.”

Youngjae stands beside Daehyun, inhaling the scent of coffee. 

“I never got to really thank you about last night,” Daehyun says. When Youngjae turns to him, questioning and eyebrows furrowed, he takes a deep breath. “About Yukwon.”

“Oh.”

“I… I don’t know if I could have done… _that_ without you, so thank you,” Daehyun says. 

“You’re welcome,” Youngjae replies. He snickers. “I can’t wait to see his grape ass today, though.”

Daehyun smiles into the mug. “Me too.”

They’re silent as the sun slowly rises in the horizon and the streets slowly fill with cars, but they don’t seem to feel any sense of urgency right now. Right now, they have each other and a mug of coffee between them, and it feels good. Right now, they don't have to worry about anything because right now, they're just a pair of teenagers with the world at their fingertips.

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by those super unrealistic american teen movies from the 80’s where the actors were at least a decade older than their characters and the romances were unbelievably cheesy (ft. advice i needed when i was 18 and stressing way too much about college)


End file.
